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So who's the dickhead?

Name:
Zbigniew Szymczyk (ZIG)

Title:
Department of Housing

Preferred Beverage:
Busch Pounders, Vodka/Cranberry (in pitchers), Red Headed Sluts, Tequila

Famous Quote:
"Whaddya drinking? No, no, no. What are YOU drinking? No, no. WHAT are you DRINKING?"

Known Ailiases:
Smirnoff, Zigger, Zigmund, Pollock, Pookie.

Talents:
Tinker and fixer of broken things, getting people drunk, naked blizzard marathons.

Commentary:

Zig is the technical genious of Wasted City. He has wired, tweaked, tuned or fixed almost everyones stereo, car or tap in Arrowhead. He engineered a partyball tap with a ten foot extension, so we wouldn't have to move to get another beer. Once he fixed his brakes with five nickels! Try getting a 25 cent rapair at a garage!

He has also dispensed more alcohol than Sam Adams. He used to run an underground bar known as "Zig's House"

Naked Blizzard Marathon. OK, this is, believe it or not, a true story. The night after the snow stopped falling from the "Blizzard of '93", the ground was covered with snow that was roughly three feet deep, with six to seven foot drifts. At three AM, he convinced two local ladies to get naked with him and run around the house. The girls tried to bail at the last moment, standing in front of the open kitchen door wearing nothing but towels. Unfortunately, this didn't stop Zig. Thinking quickly, he removed his own towel and both of theirs. Having no where else to go (either than Zigs MONSTROUS navel), they jetted out the door in their birthday suits and began rounding the house. After each racer had made the round trip of roughly 40 meters, they flew inside and covered up in front of the fire, except Zig, who opted to not cover himself, but rather warm his naked beef medallions by the roaring fire. After all were checked for frostbite and hypothermia, Zig called the local radio station (WKRZ FM 98.5 MHz 1-800-222-0985, call and see if they still have the tape somewhere in the archive!), and screamed, "Listen, you have to play 'Stone Cold Crazy' for me, we just got naked and ran around my house!" This famous phrase was heard several times throughout the next week, after the DJ asking people "So, what did you do during the Blizzard of '93?", or "Things not to do during a blizzard." Bizaar? Well, aren't we all?